viewed you with only contempt?
Chapter 5
S ADIE WAS ALWAYS HAPPY to return to her home in the evening. She just wished Jim would push that old truck a bit faster and never failed to be amazed at how slowly he navigated the winding, uphill drive to the house. Tonight, though, the snow made the hill treacherous, so she was glad he didn’t accelerate around the bend.
The warm, golden square windows of home were welcoming beacons through the grayish-white evening light, and Sadie could almost smell the good supper Mam had already prepared.
“See ya!” Sadie said, hopping lightly out of the old pickup.
“Mm-hm,” Jim grunted.
Sadie swung open the door to the kitchen, which was awash in the bright glow of the propane gas lamps set into the ornate wooden cabinet next to the kitchen cupboards.
“I’m home!” she sang out.
There was no answer, no supper on the stove, no table set by the French doors.
“Hey! I’m home!”
Leah came quietly into the kitchen, making no sound at all, her face pale, but smiling a welcome in the way sisters grin at one another after an absence.
Sisters were like that. A grin, a look, a soul connection, a mutual knowing that one was just as glad to see the other, an understanding of “Oh, goody, you’re home!” but with no words.
Leah was only two years younger than Sadie, and, at 18, one of the prettiest of the sisters. Blonde-haired, with the same blue eyes as Sadie, Leah was always light-hearted, happy, and upbeat about any situation. Mam said Leah was the sunshine of the family.
But today there was a soft, gray cloud over her sister’s blue eyes, and Sadie raised an eyebrow.
“What?”
“It’s Mam.”
“What?”
“I don’t know. She’s…” Leah shrugged her shoulders.
“She’s what?” Sadie asked, feeling a sickness rise in her stomach like the feeling she used to have in school before the Christmas program.
Leah shrugged again.
“I don’t know.”
Sadie faced her sister squarely, the sick feeling in her stomach launching an angry panic. She wanted to hit Leah to make her tell her what was wrong with Mam.
“Is she sick? Why do you act so dumb about this?”
Sadie fought to keep her voice level, to keep a rein on her sick panic so it wouldn’t make her cry or scream. She would do anything to stop Leah from looking like that.
“Sadie, stop.”
Leah turned her back, holding her shoulders stiffly erect as if to ward off Sadie’s obvious fear.
“Leah, is something wrong? Seriously. With our Mam?”
Leah stayed in that stiff position, and Sadie’s heart sank so low, she fought for breath. The lower your heart went, the harder it was to breathe, and breathing was definitely essential. It wasn’t that your heart literally sank. It was more like the sensation you had whenever something really, really scared you.
Sadie sat down hard, weak now, struggling to push back the looming fear. Sadie put her head in her hands, her thoughts flooding out any ability to speak rationally to her sister.
Nothing was wrong. Not really. Leah, can’t you see? Mam is okay. I haven’t noticed anything out of the ordinary. You haven’t either. She’s just tired. She’s weary of working. She loves us. She loves Dat. She has to. She loves Montana. She has to do that, too. Dat loves our mother, too. He has to. There is nothing wrong in this family. Turn around, Leah. Turn around and say it with me: There is nothing wrong in our family.
Leah turned quietly, as if any swift or sudden movement would enable the fear to grip them both.
“Sadie.”
Sadie lifted her head, meeting Leah’s eyes, and in that instant recognized with a heart-stopping knowledge that Leah knew, too.
Leah knew Mam had been … well … weird. She had been acting strangely, but not so strange that any of her daughters dared bring up the subject, ever.
They all loved Mam, and if she changed in some obvious ways, well, it was just Mam—just how some people became older. Mam had always been
Chapter 5
S ADIE WAS ALWAYS HAPPY to return to her home in the evening. She just wished Jim would push that old truck a bit faster and never failed to be amazed at how slowly he navigated the winding, uphill drive to the house. Tonight, though, the snow made the hill treacherous, so she was glad he didn’t accelerate around the bend.
The warm, golden square windows of home were welcoming beacons through the grayish-white evening light, and Sadie could almost smell the good supper Mam had already prepared.
“See ya!” Sadie said, hopping lightly out of the old pickup.
“Mm-hm,” Jim grunted.
Sadie swung open the door to the kitchen, which was awash in the bright glow of the propane gas lamps set into the ornate wooden cabinet next to the kitchen cupboards.
“I’m home!” she sang out.
There was no answer, no supper on the stove, no table set by the French doors.
“Hey! I’m home!”
Leah came quietly into the kitchen, making no sound at all, her face pale, but smiling a welcome in the way sisters grin at one another after an absence.
Sisters were like that. A grin, a look, a soul connection, a mutual knowing that one was just as glad to see the other, an understanding of “Oh, goody, you’re home!” but with no words.
Leah was only two years younger than Sadie, and, at 18, one of the prettiest of the sisters. Blonde-haired, with the same blue eyes as Sadie, Leah was always light-hearted, happy, and upbeat about any situation. Mam said Leah was the sunshine of the family.
But today there was a soft, gray cloud over her sister’s blue eyes, and Sadie raised an eyebrow.
“What?”
“It’s Mam.”
“What?”
“I don’t know. She’s…” Leah shrugged her shoulders.
“She’s what?” Sadie asked, feeling a sickness rise in her stomach like the feeling she used to have in school before the Christmas program.
Leah shrugged again.
“I don’t know.”
Sadie faced her sister squarely, the sick feeling in her stomach launching an angry panic. She wanted to hit Leah to make her tell her what was wrong with Mam.
“Is she sick? Why do you act so dumb about this?”
Sadie fought to keep her voice level, to keep a rein on her sick panic so it wouldn’t make her cry or scream. She would do anything to stop Leah from looking like that.
“Sadie, stop.”
Leah turned her back, holding her shoulders stiffly erect as if to ward off Sadie’s obvious fear.
“Leah, is something wrong? Seriously. With our Mam?”
Leah stayed in that stiff position, and Sadie’s heart sank so low, she fought for breath. The lower your heart went, the harder it was to breathe, and breathing was definitely essential. It wasn’t that your heart literally sank. It was more like the sensation you had whenever something really, really scared you.
Sadie sat down hard, weak now, struggling to push back the looming fear. Sadie put her head in her hands, her thoughts flooding out any ability to speak rationally to her sister.
Nothing was wrong. Not really. Leah, can’t you see? Mam is okay. I haven’t noticed anything out of the ordinary. You haven’t either. She’s just tired. She’s weary of working. She loves us. She loves Dat. She has to. She loves Montana. She has to do that, too. Dat loves our mother, too. He has to. There is nothing wrong in this family. Turn around, Leah. Turn around and say it with me: There is nothing wrong in our family.
Leah turned quietly, as if any swift or sudden movement would enable the fear to grip them both.
“Sadie.”
Sadie lifted her head, meeting Leah’s eyes, and in that instant recognized with a heart-stopping knowledge that Leah knew, too.
Leah knew Mam had been … well … weird. She had been acting strangely, but not so strange that any of her daughters dared bring up the subject, ever.
They all loved Mam, and if she changed in some obvious ways, well, it was just Mam—just how some people became older. Mam had always been
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