Tálknafjörður, and I know I can talk to him about anything without judgment.
“This girl is amazing,” I continue, with a wide smile breaking out across my face. Just thinking about her does that to me. I can ’t believe my reaction to Brooke. “I showed her around town yesterday and took her to the statue garden by the museum.” Gunnar nods, knowing where I’m talking about.
“We were walking up the stairs and the church bells were ringing. I swear Gunnar; even our steps were in sync. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I couldn’t help feeling like it was our wedding day or something.” I continue, feeling a little foolish, “It felt like we belonged together.”
It really had blown me away just how right it had been with her. It freaked me out, to be honest. Brooke touched something inside of me and I definitely feel affected.
After all these years, she has grown on me. That may be an understatement. She has more than grown on me; she has become an important staple in my life that I hadn’t realized out loud. I can’t imagine my life without her in it. It’s even hard to imagine a world without her next to me. Where does that leave Lára?
Shaking my head in disbelief at myself, I lift both my hands, palms up, as if weighing the pros and cons of each girl. How have I gotten myself into this pickle?
“I love Lára. I do, and I want to be with her, but this girl Brooke is beyond perfect. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” I heave a deep sigh, dropping my hands in defeat.
“Brooke, she gets me. I ’m completely comfortable with her and don’t feel as though I have to censor myself. She’s beautiful, funny, sexy…shit. She has everything I want. She’s caring, and sensitive, and so smart. For having lived the shitty life she has, she’s stronger than most people I know.” I could literally continue oozing about how great she is, but it makes me uncomfortable, since I’m still dating Lára.
“What about Lára?” Gunnar asks thoughtfully with a curious expression on his face.
“What about her? Obviously I think she ’s good enough to be dating her. She has been around forever and she has a great body. Lára is really smart too, although I think her choice of profession will lead her far away from here. That’s not for a while though. She laughs at my jokes.” I end all of it kind of lamely.
Is this really all that Lára is to me? Jokes, sex and convenience? I ’m not ready to admit that. Lára has been good to me, and I don’t want to throw it back in her face, even if just in my thoughts.
It ’s such a complicated situation. It would be so much easier if Brooke had never come. When I’m around her, well, it doesn’t get any easier. I want to see her more, but I know I shouldn’t. I’m not going to mention the near kiss to Gunnar, because I’ve already admitted enough. That was definitely a mistake and can’t happen again. I just need to see her again.
I have come to care about Brooke through all these years, and I had always thought that if by some chance we could, we would be together. Most of me had just assumed that she’d never come. I hadn’t waited for her or anything. I’ve been happily dating Lára for a while now and Brooke has known that. At least, I think I’ve been happy.
I lift my head and look at Gunnar. My brain is working up new schemes and ideas to better suit my inner desires. “I have an idea.”
“What ’s that?” Gunnar looks over at me with one eyebrow raised suspiciously. He probably thinks I’m going to come up with something skeevy. Maybe I am.
“Do you maybe have room in your car for Lára, Brooke and I, for Tálknafjör?” If I could convince Brooke to come with us, I ’d have a whole weekend with her. Oh, and Lára. I’m such a jerk.
Maybe it will be awful, but I know Brooke would love to come. I ’ve told her so much about Tálknafjörður, and she would love Pollurinn so much. Then, she could also see where I grew up. I
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