to—”
“ You seriously need to mind your own business,” I snap. “I am a big girl, Josh. I’m sorry you’re not ready for me to have a boyfriend, but trust me. I am ready.”
“It’s not that—” Josh is cut off by the sound of the front door closing. The two of us freeze.
“Hey, guys!” Mom’s voice .
Holy shit , Josh mouths as we stay frozen to the kitchen floor.
“Surpri— Oh .” Mom must’ve noticed the crowd of people in our home.
Josh and I unfreeze and race to intervene, but when we get to the den we’re surprised to find Mom not freaking out. She’s standing, holding a pizza box in her hands with a lifeless smile on her face. When she spots us her eyes show fury, but her voice remains sugary-sweet. “Hey, guys. You didn’t mention you had friends coming by.”
“Um. Sorry, Mom,” I say. “What are you doing home?”
With her nostrils flaring she calmly explains that she traded shifts with someone who needed off next weekend. “For a birthday party, I think,” she over-explains as everyone in the den listens with polite enduring-other-people’s-parents-type attention. I notice Amanda is rubbing her hand slowly up and down Stu’s bicep. The syrupiness of Mom’s voice is really unnerving me, because she should be screaming right now. She finishes by saying, “Sorry, I would’ve brought more pizza if I’d realized.”
Josh actually lets out a laugh before clapping his hand over his mouth.
“That’s okay, Stu and I really need to get going.” Mark starts the good-byes, so I jump in and let Mom know I was just about to drive the boys home. Everything is hurried and awkward, which is probably why Mark doesn’t give me a hug or even a handshake good-bye before heading out the door.
I’m left wondering what my first kiss would’ve felt like as we all clear out of the house before Mom even takes her coat off.
I envy everyone who doesn’t have to come back here to face her the way Josh and I do. Too bad asking Mark if I can sleep over would be considered a little too forward.
Superturd is crawling sadly along at under 20 miles per hour. “Ask for forgiveness, not permission,” I mock my brother as we head back toward our doom. Everyone knows the oldest child bears the burden of blame in these situations. Never mind the fact that this was all Josh’s idea . So unfair.
“She’s never come home early,” Josh defends. “It’s like she has some sort of weird spidey-Mom-sense or something.” He’s trying to butter me up with a Spider-Man reference. It’s not working. “I am honestly sorry, Blaze.”
“And what the hell was with freaking me out over Ajay’s asthma?”
Josh gives a sigh and sinks down into his seat. “Trust me. I was desperate. Mark is not who you think he is.”
“Never mind who I think he is.” I pull into the driveway and cut the minivan’s engine. “You need to butt out.” I don’t need my little brother sabotaging my love life on top of everything else I have working against it.
We’re quiet for a moment, both procrastinating. “You think she’s going to kill us?” Josh asks.
“You’d think so. But she didn’t seem too upset when she caught us.”
“Yeah. She actually seemed kind of cool with the party.”
Turns out, Mom was Not. Cool. With the party.
The moment the two of us walk in the door she launches into a tirade about how embarrassing and offensive it was to enter her own home and be slapped by such dishonesty.
“I try to do something nice, and what happens?” She’s close to hysterics, and I glance around at the den to confirm that the place isn’t trashed. It actually looks a little neater than usual, since Josh and I straightened up before everyone got here.
After we’ve endured her verbal wrath for a time, Mom sends Josh upstairs to bed so she can “talk to Blaze alone.” Told you so.
Josh mouths I’m sorry on his way up the stairs.
As soon as he’s gone, she announces, “You, young lady, are
“ You seriously need to mind your own business,” I snap. “I am a big girl, Josh. I’m sorry you’re not ready for me to have a boyfriend, but trust me. I am ready.”
“It’s not that—” Josh is cut off by the sound of the front door closing. The two of us freeze.
“Hey, guys!” Mom’s voice .
Holy shit , Josh mouths as we stay frozen to the kitchen floor.
“Surpri— Oh .” Mom must’ve noticed the crowd of people in our home.
Josh and I unfreeze and race to intervene, but when we get to the den we’re surprised to find Mom not freaking out. She’s standing, holding a pizza box in her hands with a lifeless smile on her face. When she spots us her eyes show fury, but her voice remains sugary-sweet. “Hey, guys. You didn’t mention you had friends coming by.”
“Um. Sorry, Mom,” I say. “What are you doing home?”
With her nostrils flaring she calmly explains that she traded shifts with someone who needed off next weekend. “For a birthday party, I think,” she over-explains as everyone in the den listens with polite enduring-other-people’s-parents-type attention. I notice Amanda is rubbing her hand slowly up and down Stu’s bicep. The syrupiness of Mom’s voice is really unnerving me, because she should be screaming right now. She finishes by saying, “Sorry, I would’ve brought more pizza if I’d realized.”
Josh actually lets out a laugh before clapping his hand over his mouth.
“That’s okay, Stu and I really need to get going.” Mark starts the good-byes, so I jump in and let Mom know I was just about to drive the boys home. Everything is hurried and awkward, which is probably why Mark doesn’t give me a hug or even a handshake good-bye before heading out the door.
I’m left wondering what my first kiss would’ve felt like as we all clear out of the house before Mom even takes her coat off.
I envy everyone who doesn’t have to come back here to face her the way Josh and I do. Too bad asking Mark if I can sleep over would be considered a little too forward.
Superturd is crawling sadly along at under 20 miles per hour. “Ask for forgiveness, not permission,” I mock my brother as we head back toward our doom. Everyone knows the oldest child bears the burden of blame in these situations. Never mind the fact that this was all Josh’s idea . So unfair.
“She’s never come home early,” Josh defends. “It’s like she has some sort of weird spidey-Mom-sense or something.” He’s trying to butter me up with a Spider-Man reference. It’s not working. “I am honestly sorry, Blaze.”
“And what the hell was with freaking me out over Ajay’s asthma?”
Josh gives a sigh and sinks down into his seat. “Trust me. I was desperate. Mark is not who you think he is.”
“Never mind who I think he is.” I pull into the driveway and cut the minivan’s engine. “You need to butt out.” I don’t need my little brother sabotaging my love life on top of everything else I have working against it.
We’re quiet for a moment, both procrastinating. “You think she’s going to kill us?” Josh asks.
“You’d think so. But she didn’t seem too upset when she caught us.”
“Yeah. She actually seemed kind of cool with the party.”
Turns out, Mom was Not. Cool. With the party.
The moment the two of us walk in the door she launches into a tirade about how embarrassing and offensive it was to enter her own home and be slapped by such dishonesty.
“I try to do something nice, and what happens?” She’s close to hysterics, and I glance around at the den to confirm that the place isn’t trashed. It actually looks a little neater than usual, since Josh and I straightened up before everyone got here.
After we’ve endured her verbal wrath for a time, Mom sends Josh upstairs to bed so she can “talk to Blaze alone.” Told you so.
Josh mouths I’m sorry on his way up the stairs.
As soon as he’s gone, she announces, “You, young lady, are
Similar Books
