Jumping Puddles by Rachael Brownell

of the person he used to be. I can’t imagine he learned much if he was never given the opportunity to rest. On one hand, I’m worried about him. On the other hand, it angers me.
    I’m angry he was run ragged. I’m angry it appears he wasted his time working for someone who used him as a gopher when he could have been here, spending time with me. Most of all, I’m still angry at Blake for taking the damn internship to begin with. This was supposed to be our time together, and it looks as if he wasted two months and gained nothing. That’s the last thought I have as I fall asleep waiting for Blake to call me.
    Over the next two weeks, Blake and I attempt to make up for lost time. We spend every waking moment together we can. It’s not until our last full day together I realize we’ve fallen back into our old routine. I should be happy about this, thrilled to have my best friend back, but I’m not. After my visit over spring break, I was thinking we had become more than friends. Judging by the way he’s been acting and I’ve been responding, I was wrong. Dead wrong.
    It’s the little things that stand out. He doesn’t try to hold my hand. He doesn’t wrap his arm around me. The way he says my name doesn’t make my heart melt. Do I still care about him? Of course. I don’t think there will ever come a time in my life I won’t care about him. The real question is, how he feels about me. I’m still hoping for more than friendship.
    “You’re awfully quiet. What are you thinking about over there?”
    Blake’s voice interrupts the internal monologue I was having with myself. Turning my head, I find him staring at me over his sunglasses. He’s pushed them down to the tip of his nose, and I can see his eyes sparkling in the sunlight. I don’t bother to take my sunglasses off as I reposition myself on the lounge chair to face him.
    The sun is beating down on us as we sit beside his pool, enjoying the warm afternoon together. Something deep down is telling me to be honest with him. He’s relaxed, in a good mood, and there’s never going to be a better time to talk about it.
    “I was thinking about us,” I reply hesitantly.
    Blake pushes his sunglasses back into place and turns his attention to the glassy surface of the water. “What about us?”
    “You know exactly what I was thinking, Blake. Don’t play dumb with me. It doesn’t suit you.” My tone is harsh. I don’t want to play games with him. Knowing I need to lighten up if we’re going to have a conversation, I relax back into the chair and clear my throat.
    “I’m not playing dumb, Charlie. I need you to be more specific.” His voice is calm, his thoughts collected.
    “I want to know where we stand. What am I to you?” I do the best I can to keep my frustration in check and not let on he’s pissing me off by acting so flippantly.
    “Do we really have to talk about this? Can’t we just relax and enjoy our last day together?”
    “No. You’re leaving in the morning to head back to school.”
    “That’s exactly why I don’t want to talk about this right now.”
    My frustration’s no longer in check. In fact, I’m getting more agitated by the second.
    Calming breath. One. Two. Three.
    Nope. Still pissed off.
    “Look, I missed out on spending the summer with you. We didn’t get to do anything we planned on doing. When I left Santa Barbara, it seemed like we were more than friends. In fact, it still seemed that way when you left for New York. Now, you’re back, we’re here together, and it doesn’t seem that way at all. What the hell, Blake?”
    I watch as he clenches and unclenches his hands, not speaking for a few minutes. The last thing I want to do is fight with him for the last few hours we’ll get to spend together until Christmas. He has to know that. At the same time, I can’t let him leave without getting answers. I’ll go insane wondering.
    “I don’t know what to say, Charlie. I know what you want me to say, and I know