Knowing Me Knowing You by Mandy Baggot Page B

Kate knew she was in no doubt she was loathing every moment of the game show and that would make her night, well probably her weekend. But then Frank came into view as camera two moved to the left and he smiled so genuinely and gave her a thumbs up , it almost pulled at her heart strings. Lovely Frank who liked her, rich Frank who gave her champagne at Christmas, Frank with the ill wife and a son who sponged off him constantly. Kate smiled back at him and tried to swallow the knot of hopelessness that was caught in her throat. Then Colin Sykes got to his feet, clenched his fist into a ball and rolled his hand around in the air making gorilla noises. Kate kept the smile on her face, her cheeks aching. There was one thing she was certain of; they had definitely finished off the wine.
    ‘ OK, let’s open the egg - here we go. T here, right, Kate, the question is - and remember don’t say anything, just write the answer on the board - the question is - what is your middle name? ’ Larry spoke, making the question sound like rocket science.
    Kate hurriedly wrote on the board and looked back to Larry.
    ‘ All done? Final answer? Don’t need to ask the audience? ’
    ‘ You said I wasn’t allowed to say anything, ’ Kate reminded him, getting more and more annoyed with the presenter.
    ‘ OK then, Joel - what is Kate’s middle name? ’ Larry boomed excitedly.
    ‘ She doesn’t have one, ’ Joel responded almost confidently.
    ‘ And let’s see the board! ’ Larry exclaimed his eyes bulging in anticipation.
    Kate turned the board around to show the audience and it said in large letters ‘Don’t have one’.
    ‘ YES!! A MATCH! Well done Joel! That’s two Kissing Gates on the board! And one hundred pounds. There you are Kate, you can keep hold of that cheque, maybe spend it at that casino Joel is going to take you to, that’s lovely. ’
    ‘ Lovely, ’ Kate repeated.
    ‘ So, back to the game. The final question I asked Kate was - Joel wants to try out a new position in the bedroom, how does he tackle the issue? Does he A , sit you down and suggest spicing things up? Does he B, say nothing, things like that shoul dn’t be discussed; or does he C, throw you into the new position during lovemaking and see what happens? ’
    Kate’s cheeks flamed, she couldn’t look at Joel. She wanted the stage to eat her up and quickly. She could almost feel Miranda’s delight at her obvious embarrassment. She would be sniggering under her breath, whispering ‘perfect’ like a female Bond villain . A ll she needed was a cat to stroke and a monocle. She was poised, waiting with bated breath to see just how moronic Kate was going to look next. 
    She couldn’t even remember what she had answered to the cringeworthy question. She didn’t even care, she just wanted to get home . S he didn’t want to be out any more, being out was not the frivolous fun Hermione had spoken about at length. She wanted to be with Bethan , being a mother and watching repeats of Peppa Pig .
    ‘ Definitely C , ’ Joel answered.
    ‘ YES!! That’s a match! Well done Kate and Joel, together with your Golden Egg b onus that means there are three Kissing Gates on the board and you are our current leaders! Congratulations! Although bear in mind, there ar e several other couples to come. OK let’s give Kate and Joel a big hand, ’ Larry announced and he held out his silver sleeved arm, directing them stage right.
    Kate practically ran for cover, her face glowing and her mouth dry. She needed to get to the bar, she almost felt sober and she did not want to be sober . S he didn’t want to be able to remember any part of this evening.
    ‘ Hey, we’re the current leaders! ’ Joel said to her as they prepared to leave the backstage area and return to the tables.
    ‘ Fantastic! How the Hell did that happen? How do you know I don’t have a middle name? ’ Kate questioned, trying to squeeze herself past the Love Dove who was blocking one of the