why she thought he was there, but she felt his presence like she felt her own. He was part of her soul; maybe that is why she thought she could feel him here, in this room. She slid down the door and sat on the floor, drawing her legs up as far as she could with her protruding belly. She now could see the end of the bed and Alex’s feet sticking up under the covers. She stared at them for what seemed like an eternity, trying to get the courage to stand up and see him for the last time.
Finally, she slowly got up off of the floor. Still averting her eyes, she headed towards the bed that held the love of her life. Her breath came in shallow spurts as she tried to will herself to look at him. Her peripheral vision told her that he was laying there with his arms to his sides and the blanket pulled up to his broad chest. Kayley closed her eyes and stepped closer to the bed, reaching her hands out to grip the railing of the bed so she didn’t run into it. When her hands made contact with the cold metal rails, she sucked her breath in. Open your eyes, she willed herself. Kayley knew that opening them and looking at Alex was a life altering moment. She would never again be the same. She cracked her eyes open, his face coming into view. She willed herself to open her eyes the rest of the way, and when she finally did, she locked her eyes on Alex’s handsome face. He looked- perfect. Peaceful. There was bruising and scrapes on his face, neck, and collarbone, and his head was wrapped in gauze from his surgery, but it was him. Alex. He was laying here just like he was sleeping. His full lips were red, his dark eyelashes fanned across his cheeks. She scanned his broad shoulders and muscular chest and stomach, covered by the blanket but she knew his body like her own. She reached her hand out and touched his hand, briefly, then pulled back, shocked. How could he feel like her Alex, but not be there anymore? She stared at his left hand where the imprint was there of his wedding band, but the jewelry itself wasn’t there anymore. A sob escaped her lips as she realized why- they wouldn’t leave a wedding ring on someone who wasn’t alive anymore.
Kayley’s body shook as her eyes traveled back to Alex’s beautiful face, the face that she had loved for so long now, she could hardly remember a time in her life without him. That face had kissed her so many times, smiled at her, loved her. She reached her hand out again and caressed his face, his lips, his eyes, his beautiful cheekbones. She leaned her face over him and she swore she could still smell the aftershave that he wore and she loved so much. Tears dripped from her eyes onto his face. She wiped them gently away. She leaned down and kissed his lips one more time. They felt just like him, just like home. Her body shuddered as she rested her forehead on his for one last time.
“Alex,” she whispered. “Why? Why did they take you away from me? It’s not fair! You just look like you’re sleeping. Wake up, baby! Please, wake up!”
“Kayley,” a voice filtered through her brain. She blinked her eyes and looked up to see her dad standing next to her. She sat straight up in the hospital chair. Had she fallen asleep?
“What’s the matter, is she okay?” Kayley panicked, standing up to meet her dad’s eye. He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder and smiled thinly.
“She’s awake,” he said, hugging Kayley to him. “They are running some tests, but you can go in.” She didn’t even stop to hear the last syllable, she was already on her feet and going to Alexis’ room. A crib was in the room and she was laying in it, eyes open but she was not moving. An IV was dripping fluid into her arm and a monitor was keeping track of her heartbeat and oxygen level.
“Lexi,” Kayley sobbed, not even acknowledging the other people in the room. When she heard her mom’s voice, she turned her eyes and reached her arms out. Kayley leaned over Alexis’ crib and hugged her
Finally, she slowly got up off of the floor. Still averting her eyes, she headed towards the bed that held the love of her life. Her breath came in shallow spurts as she tried to will herself to look at him. Her peripheral vision told her that he was laying there with his arms to his sides and the blanket pulled up to his broad chest. Kayley closed her eyes and stepped closer to the bed, reaching her hands out to grip the railing of the bed so she didn’t run into it. When her hands made contact with the cold metal rails, she sucked her breath in. Open your eyes, she willed herself. Kayley knew that opening them and looking at Alex was a life altering moment. She would never again be the same. She cracked her eyes open, his face coming into view. She willed herself to open her eyes the rest of the way, and when she finally did, she locked her eyes on Alex’s handsome face. He looked- perfect. Peaceful. There was bruising and scrapes on his face, neck, and collarbone, and his head was wrapped in gauze from his surgery, but it was him. Alex. He was laying here just like he was sleeping. His full lips were red, his dark eyelashes fanned across his cheeks. She scanned his broad shoulders and muscular chest and stomach, covered by the blanket but she knew his body like her own. She reached her hand out and touched his hand, briefly, then pulled back, shocked. How could he feel like her Alex, but not be there anymore? She stared at his left hand where the imprint was there of his wedding band, but the jewelry itself wasn’t there anymore. A sob escaped her lips as she realized why- they wouldn’t leave a wedding ring on someone who wasn’t alive anymore.
Kayley’s body shook as her eyes traveled back to Alex’s beautiful face, the face that she had loved for so long now, she could hardly remember a time in her life without him. That face had kissed her so many times, smiled at her, loved her. She reached her hand out again and caressed his face, his lips, his eyes, his beautiful cheekbones. She leaned her face over him and she swore she could still smell the aftershave that he wore and she loved so much. Tears dripped from her eyes onto his face. She wiped them gently away. She leaned down and kissed his lips one more time. They felt just like him, just like home. Her body shuddered as she rested her forehead on his for one last time.
“Alex,” she whispered. “Why? Why did they take you away from me? It’s not fair! You just look like you’re sleeping. Wake up, baby! Please, wake up!”
“Kayley,” a voice filtered through her brain. She blinked her eyes and looked up to see her dad standing next to her. She sat straight up in the hospital chair. Had she fallen asleep?
“What’s the matter, is she okay?” Kayley panicked, standing up to meet her dad’s eye. He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder and smiled thinly.
“She’s awake,” he said, hugging Kayley to him. “They are running some tests, but you can go in.” She didn’t even stop to hear the last syllable, she was already on her feet and going to Alexis’ room. A crib was in the room and she was laying in it, eyes open but she was not moving. An IV was dripping fluid into her arm and a monitor was keeping track of her heartbeat and oxygen level.
“Lexi,” Kayley sobbed, not even acknowledging the other people in the room. When she heard her mom’s voice, she turned her eyes and reached her arms out. Kayley leaned over Alexis’ crib and hugged her
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