Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 07 by Startled by His Furry Shorts

pathetic is she, trailing around after Masimo? Anyway, Octopushead was still raving on: “Well, I am waiting! What were you doing outside the school gates?”
    The titch sisters started blubbing even more, and one said, “I…d-d-d-don’t kn-n-n-know.”
    Lindsay said, “Ah you don’t know. Well, I tell you what I will do. I will let you have a long think about it. Until you do know. And whilst you are thinking you can clear out the sports cupboard after school on Monday.”
    One of them said, “But but…I have got…blub blub…violin practice on Mondays.”
    Wet Lindsay said, “You did have violin practice. Clear off.”
    The two blubsters went blubbing off down the corridor. As I went by Octopussy I gave her my worst look. But I didn’t say anything. Then I just let my eyes fix on a place where her forehead should have been if she’d had one. She put her hand up like she thought she had an antenna growing there or something. Hahahahah yesss result. The forehead staring campaign continues. She said, “Are you wearing makeup?”
    â€œIt’s for the play.”
    As she was about to go into the common room, she said, “A bit of advice, lady. You are making yourself look like a ridiculous tart trailing around after Masimo. It makes you look like what you are, a silly cheap pathetic baby. I think you are ridiculous and he thinks you are ridiculous. He’s too nice to say, but he told me he feels really sorry for you. Do yourself and all of us a favor, stop making a fool of yourself. He’s out of your league.”
    Even though I hate her a million and a half and know she is a liar, I did feel my face going all red.
    five minutes later
    The ace gang were in the tarts’ wardrobe getting ready for the Foxwood boys’ extravaganza. The whole school is on high hysteria alert. I even saw a couple of first formers with a bit of lippy on. It’s insane, really, because it’s not like we are shut up in a convent. Some people really have no self-controlnosity when it comes to boys.
    I couldn’t get near the mirror to check my final makeup, but I like to think I have achieved a natural look. Unlike Ellen. Her lip gloss was so thick, she looked like she had plunged her gob into a pot of treacle. Even Jas was using eyelash curlers. Why? Tom wasn’t even in MacUseless . I said that, to try to recover after my octopus encounter.
    â€œWhy are you curling your eyelashes when your so-called beloved is not even going to be here?”
    She spluttered on about Lady Macbeth, saying that the curly eyelashes were all part of the historical detail, that she would be wearing authentic drawstring pants under her dress and so on, rambling on. I wish I had never mentioned it. I told the gang what Lindsay had said.
    Jools said, “What a prize bitch.”
    And Ro Ro said, “Octopussy talks WUBBISH!!”
    Mabs said, “Let’s kill her. No one would notice.”
    It’s nice that they care and offer sensible advice, but all the same I am still, as Elvis (he dared to rock) Presley said, “…all shook up, ah huh.”
    I said to Jas as we trolled off to the main hall, “She practically said I was stalking Masimo. How could she say that?”
    Jas said, “Well, she’s got a point. It’s just that she doesn’t know she has.”
    â€œWhat are you rambling on about now?”
    â€œWell, you tried to find him in Hamburger-a-gogo land—you know, when you rang everyone in New York, New York, called Scarlotti and ended up ordering Chinese takeaway, and then you…”
    Oh God, bang on about history, why don’t you.
    I said, “Jas, that was before I got maturiosity.”
    Jas laughed. Which makes her look stupid.
    five minutes later
    What if Masimo is at the gates? I will just sneak out in a casualosity at all times to see if I can see him.
    two minutes later
    I walked across the side of