Out of the Blues by Mercy Celeste

through a crowd of people that I used to know and I didn’t know who any of them were now. I waved to Kenny and Tyler and I knew we’d get together sometime over the next couple of days. They knew where to find me. I was here all week.
    I cast a glance at my dad leaning over the bar talking to one of the barmaids, I think I might have dated her in high school, fuck if I could remember. But he was like that. He walked out on his first set of kids and his wife and started dating nineteen-year-olds before his current wife came along and ended all of that. They had two little boys, not twins, I think they were around seven and eight. I didn’t know. I’d never actually met them. We didn’t see him for years after he left, and when he did come back into our lives we weren’t invited to mingle with his new family. I guess I was bitter about that. Maybe I had refused to see him. I don’t remember.
    Water under the bridge and I didn’t want to wade into it.
    I came home to see my sister get married. End of story.
    I left my dad there talking up a girl young enough to be his daughter and, shaking my head, I left the bar.
    I stepped out into the chilly night air and realized I had no place that I wanted to go.
    I mean, I hadn’t been to town yet, but there wasn’t much in town to see anyway. Not much passed for nightlife around these parts. Especially on a Wednesday night. The town wasn’t small, but it wasn’t what anyone would call a small city. And I sure as hell didn’t want to go back to the hotel where I’d left all of the “grownups” to their cocktail party in the dining room. Great-Aunt Ethel pinched my ass. Jesus. And I didn’t even know whose side of the family she was on. She could have been from any of my mother’s marriages. Or my father’s.
    I heard voices not far away and recognized the big ass Marine’s low rumble. I know I turned red. I could feel heat racing from various parts of my body then just as quickly back to where it came from. I went dizzy. He’d blown me.
    I’d had sex with a dude. Not just any dude. A Marine. And not just any Marine, but one I was about to be almost related to.
    Best fucking blow job I’ve ever had .
    I stopped walking and grabbed onto the nearest immovable object I could find. My knees almost buckled.
    I let a guy blow me and it was the best damn sex I’d ever had.
    I was so fucking fucked right now.
    “Kilby, talk to me, okay. You’re starting to scare me.”
    Okay, what the fuck could a big fucking Marine be doing to put the panic in my future bro-law’s voice?
    Curiosity won out and I pulled my shit together and followed Hunter’s voice.
    I found them over by the side of the bar that used to be a gas station. I could see Hunter standing beside a red CUV where he seemed to be speaking to the ground.
    “Hey,” I called out, because if that Marine was in the middle of some kind of flashback to his time in whichever theater he’d seen action in, I sure as fuck didn’t want to get caught in the crossfire. “You guys okay?”
    “Mason?” Hunter sounded relieved when he called my name.
    “Yeah. What’s going on?”
    I rounded the car parked beside Hunter’s Mercedes and stopped cold at the sight of the Marine crouched on the ground with his head between his knees. He was breathing heavy.
    “Is he drunk?” I asked because I’d been there a couple of times before I realized I was probably heading to the ward at Betty Ford specifically for fucked up celebrity kids.
    “Not drunk,” the Marine answered. “Too many people.”
    “Okay,” I said, not understanding at all.
    “It’s PTSD Mace. The noise and the crowds. Some vets can’t handle it.” Hunter tried to explain.
    “It’s a panic attack and I had those before I went into the Marines. Shut up about shit you don’t understand, Hunter,” the Marine growled at his brother. “I’m fine. I just need some air and to get out of here. Too many people that I don’t know. Too much noise.” He