nothing to her and Elvis might could sing about the shaking inside me but I for sure canât say anything about it and I push past her. âHoney?â she asks after me.
I slam the back door and I beat it down the street toward the river and itâs August so itâs still light out but the sun is softer this time of day and Iâm glad for that. I start trying to concentrate on Tina waiting for me and I want the light and I want it to be soft and I keep thinking about how she says I donât have to talk and that makes me feel better and it makes me think that Iâm right about Tina. And thinking that, I start to feel the eyes on me. Iâm going along a street of shotguns that are like them twins you see in pictures that are joined at the hip and the stoops all have people sitting and catching the early-night sun and maybe a little breeze off the river and the men are smoking and the women are in their bare feet and they all are looking at me as I pass and they know the sight of me cause I been coming by here for a long time and they always say Hi.
So they know enough to see the difference in me. They know I got something on my mind now. They can see things like that. Most of them along here are black folks and Elvis had a special feel for them. They taught him his music. He always said that. And they know by just looking at me that Iâm thinking about Tina. They smile at me and say, Evening, and I dip my head when they do because I donât want them to think I donât appreciate who they are but it makes me feel real funny this night because theyâre right. Iâm thinking of the looks she says sheâs been giving me and I can see her eyes on me from across the classroom and they are flat blue and when they fix on me they donât move, they always wait for me to turn away, and I always do, and now I think maybe sheâs been seeing as much about me as these folks on the stoops. Maybe more. I think maybe when I show her who I am, sheâll just say real low, but in wonder, âI knew it all along.â
Then Iâm past Pelican Liquors and the boarded up Piggly Wiggly and a bottle gang is shaping up for the evening on the next corner and they lift their paper bags to me and I just hurry on and I can see a containership slipping by at the far end of the street and I have to keep myself from running. I walk. I donât want to be sweating a lot when I get there. I just walk. But walking makes my mind turn. Mamaâs robe falls open and I look away as quick as I can but I see the center of her chest like you sometimes see the light after you turn it off, she comes out of her bedroom and her robe falls open and I see the hollow of her chest, nothing more, and when I turn away I can still see her chest and itâs naked white and I wonder why Elvis didnât appear there. She couldâve kept her own secret then and known his too, and there wouldnât never had to be nobody else involved in the whole thing.
Iâm walking real slow now. I even stop. The ship has passed and it looks like the street up ahead just runs off into nothing. I canât see the river. But I know itâs there and the warehouse is not far now and I hear a sound nearby and I leap a little inside and I turn and it ainât nothing but an old hound up on its back legs trying to get into a trash can. I watch him for a long time and he turns his head once, one of his ears flopping over his nose, and then he goes on trying to get in, though it doesnât look like he ever will.
And then I see that the light is starting to slip away and I better get on, if Iâm going to do this thing. And I turn down the next street and I can see the river now and I follow it and the warehouse has a chain link fence as high as my house but itâs cut in a few places and I find Tina on the other side already and she sees me and she comes my way. Sheâs wearing a stretchy top with ruffles
I slam the back door and I beat it down the street toward the river and itâs August so itâs still light out but the sun is softer this time of day and Iâm glad for that. I start trying to concentrate on Tina waiting for me and I want the light and I want it to be soft and I keep thinking about how she says I donât have to talk and that makes me feel better and it makes me think that Iâm right about Tina. And thinking that, I start to feel the eyes on me. Iâm going along a street of shotguns that are like them twins you see in pictures that are joined at the hip and the stoops all have people sitting and catching the early-night sun and maybe a little breeze off the river and the men are smoking and the women are in their bare feet and they all are looking at me as I pass and they know the sight of me cause I been coming by here for a long time and they always say Hi.
So they know enough to see the difference in me. They know I got something on my mind now. They can see things like that. Most of them along here are black folks and Elvis had a special feel for them. They taught him his music. He always said that. And they know by just looking at me that Iâm thinking about Tina. They smile at me and say, Evening, and I dip my head when they do because I donât want them to think I donât appreciate who they are but it makes me feel real funny this night because theyâre right. Iâm thinking of the looks she says sheâs been giving me and I can see her eyes on me from across the classroom and they are flat blue and when they fix on me they donât move, they always wait for me to turn away, and I always do, and now I think maybe sheâs been seeing as much about me as these folks on the stoops. Maybe more. I think maybe when I show her who I am, sheâll just say real low, but in wonder, âI knew it all along.â
Then Iâm past Pelican Liquors and the boarded up Piggly Wiggly and a bottle gang is shaping up for the evening on the next corner and they lift their paper bags to me and I just hurry on and I can see a containership slipping by at the far end of the street and I have to keep myself from running. I walk. I donât want to be sweating a lot when I get there. I just walk. But walking makes my mind turn. Mamaâs robe falls open and I look away as quick as I can but I see the center of her chest like you sometimes see the light after you turn it off, she comes out of her bedroom and her robe falls open and I see the hollow of her chest, nothing more, and when I turn away I can still see her chest and itâs naked white and I wonder why Elvis didnât appear there. She couldâve kept her own secret then and known his too, and there wouldnât never had to be nobody else involved in the whole thing.
Iâm walking real slow now. I even stop. The ship has passed and it looks like the street up ahead just runs off into nothing. I canât see the river. But I know itâs there and the warehouse is not far now and I hear a sound nearby and I leap a little inside and I turn and it ainât nothing but an old hound up on its back legs trying to get into a trash can. I watch him for a long time and he turns his head once, one of his ears flopping over his nose, and then he goes on trying to get in, though it doesnât look like he ever will.
And then I see that the light is starting to slip away and I better get on, if Iâm going to do this thing. And I turn down the next street and I can see the river now and I follow it and the warehouse has a chain link fence as high as my house but itâs cut in a few places and I find Tina on the other side already and she sees me and she comes my way. Sheâs wearing a stretchy top with ruffles
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