trying to keep her joy hidden as she realized what this couldmean: she, Mrs Earwig, was going to be one of the most senior witches in Lancre. Perhaps she could get her latest girl into that old cottage in the woods? Her sharp face went even sharper as she thought how magickal she could make it look with the help of a few curse-nets, charms, runic symbols, silver stars, black velvet drapes and – oh yes, the essential crystal ball.
She called to her latestyoung trainee to fetch her cape and broomstick, and pulled on her very best pair of black lacy gloves, the ones with the silver symbols stitched over each fingertip. She would need to Make an Entrance . . .
In Boffo’s Novelty and Joke Emporium, 4 Tenth Egg Street, Ankh-Morpork – ‘ Everything for the Hag in a Hurry ’ – Mrs Proust said, ‘What a shame, but the old girl had a good innings.’
Witchesdon’t have leaders, of course, but everyone knew that Granny Weatherwax had been the best leader they didn’t have, so now someone else would need to step forward to generally steer the witches. And to keep an eye too on anyone prone to a bit of cackling.
Mrs Proust put down an imitation cackle she had taken from her Compare the Cackle display, and looked towards her son Derek and said, ‘There’sgoing to be an argument now, or my name’s not Eunice Proust. But it will surely be young Tiffany Aching who gets that steading. We all saw what she can do. My word, we did!’ And in her mind, she said, Go to it, Tiffany, before somebody else does.
In the palace, Drumknott the clerk hurried with the Ankh-Morpork Times to the Oblong Office where Lord Vetinari, the Patrician of the city, had beenwaiting for his daily crossword to arrive.
But Vetinari already knew the news that mattered. ‘There will be some trouble. Mark my words, I expect squabbling on the distaff side.’ He sighed. ‘Any ideas, Drumknott? Who will rise to the top of the brew, do you think?’ He tapped the top of his ebony cane as he considered his own question.
‘Well, my lord,’ said Drumknott, ‘the rumour on the clacksis that it’s likely to be Tiffany Aching. Quite young.’
‘Quite young, yes. And any good?’ asked Vetinari.
‘I believe so, sir.’
‘What about this woman called Mrs Earwig?’
Drumknott made a face. ‘All show, my lord, doesn’t get her hands dirty. Lot of jewellery, black lace, you know the type. Well-connected, but that’s about all I can say.’
‘Ah yes, now you tell me, I’ve seen her. Pushy andfull of herself. She’s the kind who goes to soirees.’
‘So do you, my lord.’
‘Yes, but I am the tyrant, so it’s the job I have to do, alas. Now, this Aching young lady – what else do we know about her? Wasn’t there some bother the last time she was in the city?’
‘My lord, the Nac Mac Feegles are very fond of her and she of them. They consider themselves an honour guard to her on occasions.’
‘Drumknott.’
‘Yes, my lord?’
‘I’m going to use a word I’ve not used before. Crivens! We don’t want Feegles around here again. We can’t afford it!’
‘Unlikely, my lord. Mistress Aching has them in hand and she’s unlikely to want to repeat the events of her last visit, which after all had no long-lasting damage.’
‘Didn’t the King’s Head become the King’s Neck?’ fn5
‘Yes indeed, my lord, but ithas in fact proved a welcome change to many, most of all to the publican, who is still getting wealthy because of the tourists. It’s in the guide books.’
‘If she has the Nac Mac Feegles on her side, she is a force to be reckoned with,’ Vetinari mused.
‘The young lady is also known to be thoughtful, helpful and clever.’
‘Without being insufferable? I wish I could say the same of Mrs Earwig.Hmm,’ said Vetinari, ‘we should keep a careful eye on her . . .’
Mustrum Ridcully, Archchancellor of Unseen University, stared at his bedroom wall, and cried again, and once he’d pulled himself together he
She called to her latestyoung trainee to fetch her cape and broomstick, and pulled on her very best pair of black lacy gloves, the ones with the silver symbols stitched over each fingertip. She would need to Make an Entrance . . .
In Boffo’s Novelty and Joke Emporium, 4 Tenth Egg Street, Ankh-Morpork – ‘ Everything for the Hag in a Hurry ’ – Mrs Proust said, ‘What a shame, but the old girl had a good innings.’
Witchesdon’t have leaders, of course, but everyone knew that Granny Weatherwax had been the best leader they didn’t have, so now someone else would need to step forward to generally steer the witches. And to keep an eye too on anyone prone to a bit of cackling.
Mrs Proust put down an imitation cackle she had taken from her Compare the Cackle display, and looked towards her son Derek and said, ‘There’sgoing to be an argument now, or my name’s not Eunice Proust. But it will surely be young Tiffany Aching who gets that steading. We all saw what she can do. My word, we did!’ And in her mind, she said, Go to it, Tiffany, before somebody else does.
In the palace, Drumknott the clerk hurried with the Ankh-Morpork Times to the Oblong Office where Lord Vetinari, the Patrician of the city, had beenwaiting for his daily crossword to arrive.
But Vetinari already knew the news that mattered. ‘There will be some trouble. Mark my words, I expect squabbling on the distaff side.’ He sighed. ‘Any ideas, Drumknott? Who will rise to the top of the brew, do you think?’ He tapped the top of his ebony cane as he considered his own question.
‘Well, my lord,’ said Drumknott, ‘the rumour on the clacksis that it’s likely to be Tiffany Aching. Quite young.’
‘Quite young, yes. And any good?’ asked Vetinari.
‘I believe so, sir.’
‘What about this woman called Mrs Earwig?’
Drumknott made a face. ‘All show, my lord, doesn’t get her hands dirty. Lot of jewellery, black lace, you know the type. Well-connected, but that’s about all I can say.’
‘Ah yes, now you tell me, I’ve seen her. Pushy andfull of herself. She’s the kind who goes to soirees.’
‘So do you, my lord.’
‘Yes, but I am the tyrant, so it’s the job I have to do, alas. Now, this Aching young lady – what else do we know about her? Wasn’t there some bother the last time she was in the city?’
‘My lord, the Nac Mac Feegles are very fond of her and she of them. They consider themselves an honour guard to her on occasions.’
‘Drumknott.’
‘Yes, my lord?’
‘I’m going to use a word I’ve not used before. Crivens! We don’t want Feegles around here again. We can’t afford it!’
‘Unlikely, my lord. Mistress Aching has them in hand and she’s unlikely to want to repeat the events of her last visit, which after all had no long-lasting damage.’
‘Didn’t the King’s Head become the King’s Neck?’ fn5
‘Yes indeed, my lord, but ithas in fact proved a welcome change to many, most of all to the publican, who is still getting wealthy because of the tourists. It’s in the guide books.’
‘If she has the Nac Mac Feegles on her side, she is a force to be reckoned with,’ Vetinari mused.
‘The young lady is also known to be thoughtful, helpful and clever.’
‘Without being insufferable? I wish I could say the same of Mrs Earwig.Hmm,’ said Vetinari, ‘we should keep a careful eye on her . . .’
Mustrum Ridcully, Archchancellor of Unseen University, stared at his bedroom wall, and cried again, and once he’d pulled himself together he
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