I'm like some of those other actors
that secretly crave men. I told them Manny is a good friend and refused to discuss the matter. I can't deal with their
scrutiny of my private affairs.
And there is Mary Elizabeth.
She's still my little sister's best friend and I'm almost sure she lives in this house as well, because for three days I
haven't been able to go to the restroom without bumping into her. She follows me around. She wants to talk. She tried
to kiss me. Twice! She flirts, and my parents encourage her. Apparently, they want for me to start dating her because
she's an excellent girl from a good family and would take care of me.
Mary Elizabeth Spencer is the reason why I'm hiding in my old bedroom at three o'clock in the afternoon.
God, I want to go back home. I want to see my Manny.
"Mary Elizabeth Spencer," Michael tried the name out loud. "That explains our last name. It was
Grandma's maiden name. I'm going to have to look into that. See if there's any of her family
around." He bit his worried his lower lip and shook his head. "Shit, Richard. How could this be?
You're all jealous and shit of the women wanting to get with Manny… worried about him getting
with any of them, and at the end, it was you who bailed on the poor guy and married a woman you
didn't even like."
Michael turned a few pages and sighed. It was already four o'clock. He wanted to have as many
facts as possible before dinner, but he couldn't take the time to read every single word Richard had
written.
He skimmed through a few journal entries and smiled when he read Richard had finally
purchased his dream house in Malibu. He loved to look at the ocean because it reminded him of his Manny.
Going by the journal entries, they'd had an honest to God relationship. Somehow they managed
to go to the movies together. They went out to dinner a few times and visited museums. They even
went to see Elvis and The Beatles together.
Richard had seen The Beatles in concert.
Live.
"Lucky bastard."
Life had been good to the man. He was young and all kinds of handsome. He had money, fame,
and love. He should've been happy, but Michael could tell, even when Richard didn't write about it,
that he wasn't. Hiding was getting to him. He went back and forth between wanting to be out as a
gay man and wanting to hide who he was; between wanting Manny to be out with him and resenting
his man whenever Manny suggested they left everything behind and became hippies.
There was pressure on both of them, too. From their families, producers, coaches, and friends.
They all kept asking when they were planning on marrying nice girls and starting families. At times
Richard thought he never would, but some other times he wrote it would be a good idea.
Michael wondered if Manny had been aware of Richard's doubts before he got news of his
man's impending wedding.
Probably not.
March 7, 1965
After three weeks apart, I'm finally on my way to see Manny. Thanks to Benjamin's generosity we will get to be
together for quite some time, as my good friend is letting us stay at his Florida house. Ten days in a private paradise;
surrounded by the same bright sun, white sand and blue ocean that months ago witnessed the beginning of what I hope
will be the rest of my life. No maids; no cooks; no help in any way. We'll have to fend for ourselves, but we will be completely alone. I can't wait to get there.
Although Manny is flying out of Los Angeles it was impossible for us to be on the same plane. Benjamin said it
would be a fool's move to let others know of our intentions. I had to agree. Manny wasn't as easily convinced. He
wants to scream at the top of his lungs that I am his and he is mine. He wants the entire world to know we are
together and is ready to bat a few heads off if anyone dare say to his face that this is wrong. It took me hours but he
finally agreed to say he's going to see
that secretly crave men. I told them Manny is a good friend and refused to discuss the matter. I can't deal with their
scrutiny of my private affairs.
And there is Mary Elizabeth.
She's still my little sister's best friend and I'm almost sure she lives in this house as well, because for three days I
haven't been able to go to the restroom without bumping into her. She follows me around. She wants to talk. She tried
to kiss me. Twice! She flirts, and my parents encourage her. Apparently, they want for me to start dating her because
she's an excellent girl from a good family and would take care of me.
Mary Elizabeth Spencer is the reason why I'm hiding in my old bedroom at three o'clock in the afternoon.
God, I want to go back home. I want to see my Manny.
"Mary Elizabeth Spencer," Michael tried the name out loud. "That explains our last name. It was
Grandma's maiden name. I'm going to have to look into that. See if there's any of her family
around." He bit his worried his lower lip and shook his head. "Shit, Richard. How could this be?
You're all jealous and shit of the women wanting to get with Manny… worried about him getting
with any of them, and at the end, it was you who bailed on the poor guy and married a woman you
didn't even like."
Michael turned a few pages and sighed. It was already four o'clock. He wanted to have as many
facts as possible before dinner, but he couldn't take the time to read every single word Richard had
written.
He skimmed through a few journal entries and smiled when he read Richard had finally
purchased his dream house in Malibu. He loved to look at the ocean because it reminded him of his Manny.
Going by the journal entries, they'd had an honest to God relationship. Somehow they managed
to go to the movies together. They went out to dinner a few times and visited museums. They even
went to see Elvis and The Beatles together.
Richard had seen The Beatles in concert.
Live.
"Lucky bastard."
Life had been good to the man. He was young and all kinds of handsome. He had money, fame,
and love. He should've been happy, but Michael could tell, even when Richard didn't write about it,
that he wasn't. Hiding was getting to him. He went back and forth between wanting to be out as a
gay man and wanting to hide who he was; between wanting Manny to be out with him and resenting
his man whenever Manny suggested they left everything behind and became hippies.
There was pressure on both of them, too. From their families, producers, coaches, and friends.
They all kept asking when they were planning on marrying nice girls and starting families. At times
Richard thought he never would, but some other times he wrote it would be a good idea.
Michael wondered if Manny had been aware of Richard's doubts before he got news of his
man's impending wedding.
Probably not.
March 7, 1965
After three weeks apart, I'm finally on my way to see Manny. Thanks to Benjamin's generosity we will get to be
together for quite some time, as my good friend is letting us stay at his Florida house. Ten days in a private paradise;
surrounded by the same bright sun, white sand and blue ocean that months ago witnessed the beginning of what I hope
will be the rest of my life. No maids; no cooks; no help in any way. We'll have to fend for ourselves, but we will be completely alone. I can't wait to get there.
Although Manny is flying out of Los Angeles it was impossible for us to be on the same plane. Benjamin said it
would be a fool's move to let others know of our intentions. I had to agree. Manny wasn't as easily convinced. He
wants to scream at the top of his lungs that I am his and he is mine. He wants the entire world to know we are
together and is ready to bat a few heads off if anyone dare say to his face that this is wrong. It took me hours but he
finally agreed to say he's going to see
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